To all the lonely souls out there: happy New Year. I say this knowing the hurt and pain you are going through.
All the people who are going through the first taste of being along this year after you spouses death, the death of a parent or even having some slip away from you. Saying good by and walking out the door.
They are all hurts that take time to get over. Losing a loved one especially a spouse hurts a long time. The sting is forever.
Even though the hurt dissipates a little the hole will always be there.
The mistake that some of use do is looking for some else that is close to our spouse. By doing that we keep our self in a safe place. If we don’t love we can’t get hurt again by losing someone else. I have done that for three years.
I found that the pain didn’t’ get less as the years went on it grow stronger. But looking back I realize I did this because I was afraid of losing Brenda forever. If I didn’t feel the pain I would her lose.
We all live in our shadows of the past. The good and the bad however the bad always over cast the good.
As my mother and others have told me there is always someone else that has it worse. Ours problems are our problems and their problems are theirs. That very true but when you really take a good look at it you maybe luckier than you think.
I have a dear friend who lost her husband suddenly only to lose her son eight months later. I lose my wife that’s hard enough but to think about if I lost my daughter, that brings it into perspective.
If you lost a child or anyone in your family to gun violence. Knowing that the killer is still out there. That would be really tough to handle but these families continue on.
Being one of the many soldiers that are coming home from battle with limbs missing. Having to learn to live with this for the rest of their lives.
Being a quadriplegic, living in a wheel chair depending on others to do everything.
My cousin had a tough life and was finely getting it together he got hurt and became a quadriplegic. He didn’t want to live and he got his wish. I think of him often when I am feeling low. Being a person living within themselves, not knowing what the real world is like.
Whatever pain we live in they are always others worst off. I was told that so many times. I thought to myself who cares that’s their problem it’s not going to bring Brenda back. I lost my best friend, my soul mate, and my true love. They were right again it was a blessing to have her for ten years and enjoy her. If I didn’t have her in my life I would of miss all that she gave to life and those around her.
I know that I will never have someone like her again but I can start a new adventure with someone else.
In the end we all have to look back at the bad and learn from it. Take the good and build on it. Look towards the future and welcome it.
Make the best of ever day. Wake up every morning with a smile, Jump out of bed with great anticipation. It’s a new day with new journeys.
For all those out there that is facing this holiday season alone with the lost of a love one. Be with your friends even though you don’t feel like it. When you get home there will be plenty of time to cry.
Things will get better I hope.
I am still suffering from my loss but I am hopping that I will find someone to ease my pain. Someone who can enjoy life with me again.
We all need that, so get out there and start over as soon as you can.
I want to wish all those lonely souls out there a happy New Years and hopefully this year will be better for you. You will never get over your loss but I hope you get over you pain. Life is two short and we all know that.
If you like this article let me know. If you would like to take about you loss let me know. After three years I still feel talking about it helps.
With sincere wishes, I wish you all a Happy New Year
Herb A. Krantz
